Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: An combination for a security lock the PCs cherish will be destroyed.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: The bureaucracy has provoked an intractable crisis.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: Everyone in BLUE (Tension 13) Museum of Famous Forms is in on it; they want to discredit, destroy, maim and spit on the Troubleshooters. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A strange new Food Vat slime is causing antisocial and dangerous activity in consumers of Hot Fun. The Computer needs PCs to destroy the slime. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: Waste disposal is breaking down; garbage is backing up in the hallways and will soon flood the complex.

Mission Alert: Text message on PDC. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in empty firing range in Troubleshooter HQ. Briefing officer is weird invalid (e.g., suspended in sound-dampening gel in a swimming pool communicating through a bizarre array of tubing).

This Mission: Determine the cause of the recent Infrared riots in VIOLET (Tension 18) crowded FunBall arena (or other large room). We suspect someone (A High Programmer who has started a lottery or other credit-making scheme and has illicitly pulled needed supplies from some vital installation.).

Outfitting: PLC: Office only carries "non-ordinance" items-no weapons or weapon-like items. Offers PCs a new "Zero-Tolerance" form to sign.

Debriefing: A cavernous spherical reactor coolant chamber (recently decommisioned) with the PCs securely strapped into dentist chairs at wrist, ankle, waist and chin. The booming voice of the unseen officer echoes from strategically placed speakers.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.