Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs just aren't good enough to handle their assignment.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: A particular drug suddenly has inexplicably altered effects.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A secret society mission that went right, led by wild eyed, incoherent, even frenzied. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A geological event will destroy Alpha Complex (shatter it, open it to the elements, turn it into a cheerily warm volcano, etc.). The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A new mind-control technique will alter the PCs' or a large population's behavior for the worse. The Computer uses the PCs as guinea pigs again.

Mission Alert: Via high-frequency radio transmission that gives PCs excruciating headaches and sends petbots crazy with excitement. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded IntSec holding cells. Bureaucratic snafu assigns briefing officer to the room below the PCs; won't join PCs for fear of violating orders; shouts at the top of his voice to be heard, or conveys briefing information by notes, courier, Morse code, etc..

This Mission: Deliver this highly confidential package to BLUE Tech Services vehicle designer. Make sure no one opens it. (Contains Botulin toxin.)

Outfitting: PLC: A PLC shop that has none of the equipment needed, but is willing to make strange or incorrect substitutions, could be potentially cool stuff.

Debriefing: Debriefing conducted solely by R&D scientists. They ask many questions about equipment, giving the impression the only reason for the mission was to test equipment. After the scientists leave, The Computer covers the treason accusations.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.