Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: Everyone else in the Complex is in league against the PCs.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One or more laws of nature has been altered or revoked. It's gravity.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A subsector's Infrareds, who have gone off their pharmatherapy and are now conspiring against The Computer, led by INFRARED sector monitor screen polisher (bureaucratic obstacle, dreamy, dazed, probably a Mystic). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: An exterior force will conquer Alpha Complex. The Computer dispatches the Troubleshooters to intercept the force. The threat is real.

Mission Alert: Announced over public address loudspeakers. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in empty living quarters (IR: barracks; R-Y: dormitory; G-B: apartment; I-U: mansion). Briefing officer is hiding inside an empty Cold Fun barrel and passes written notes out to the PCs through a small bunghole.

This Mission: An unauthorized super-lubricant (seeps through any container) was accidentally deployed at empty enviro conditioning duct. Go and retrieve it before it squashes something important.

Outfitting: PLC: PLC office openly and entirely subverted by Humanists; continues business as usual, unless PCs show signs of alerting the authorities.

Debriefing: Room is fitted with seesaws, with a PC sitting on one side of each and a Blue Trooper with blaster on the other. In the lower position, the PCs are obscured by a charred blast shield. The debriefing officer reads mission details, raising each PC on a note of treason, lowering them on a point of commendation. (This is an experimental HPD&MC psychological exercise intended to encourage loyalty.)

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.