Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The Commie mutant traitors are losing, and that's bad.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One or more laws of nature has been altered or revoked. It's gravity.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: Everyone in YELLOW (Tension 9) portal to the Outdoors guarded by 19 guardbots is in on it; they want to discredit, destroy, maim and spit on the Troubleshooters. (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A major malfunction has rendered an entire sector uninhabitable; the local environment kills an unprotected citizen in minutes if not seconds. The threat is real.

Mission Alert: A polite INFRARED barracks bedding delouser acting as a courier delivers alert verbally; seeks 10cr 'tip' for the delivery. Briefing location is wrong. The alert itself is damaging-text message contains software virus that crashes PDC or vidscreen, physical alert has toxins or is radioactive, etc.

Briefing: Briefing is in crowded maintenance duct. Officer has serious coughing fit every few words, disrupting every sentence, and becomes increasingly angry with every request to repeat himself.

This Mission: IntSec has been infiltrated by no less than 17 Commie traitors. Remove them; ensure they fall in the line of duty, so we can honor them as fallen heroes.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: list price. Delivery: please allow 24 hours for delivery to PCs' specified address. The auction site has been compromised by a "phishing" scam. It appears to be legit, but is just designed to steal ME Card numbers.

Debriefing: Debriefing room is well appointed with luxurious carpet, comfortable chairs and refreshments served throughout. Soothing musics plays throughout the session. Laser emplacements are visible in every corner and track the PCs' every move.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.