Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: The PCs' secret societies have turned against them.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One or more laws of nature has been altered or revoked. It's light or sound.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A High Programmer who mis-programmed a CompNode so badly the entire node must be re-imaged and rebooted (the situation is cover for this.) (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: The Computer believes something horrible has happened, but gives the PCs no details, and forbids them to tell anyone for fear of starting a panic. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: The "Someone" believes (accurately?) the PCs are assassins sent to kill him; he tries to kill them first. Meanwhile, the PCs must complete their mission.

Mission Alert: Stamped onto side of B3 laced with MemWipe. Briefing location is wrong. The information is missing, replaced by [INSERT DATA HERE] or similar. Secret society contacts or servile truckling to The Computer may fill in missing data.

Briefing: Briefing is in CompNode SubNode. Briefing officer sits with his back to the PCs; he passes notes to a terrified Infrared citizen, who reads them aloud.

This Mission: Deliver this open beaker of bubbly green goo labeled BIOHAZARD-DO NOT OPEN! to ULTRAVIOLET who blames PCs for his treasonous acts. Though the item appears treasonous, rest assured it is perfectly above-board. Perfectly.

Outfitting: Infrared Market: This market is run by the secret society of one PC (select randomly), who always gets the best deals and everything that works.

Debriefing: Room is sheet steel with a single chair in the center and a large sign: PLEASE SIT DOWN with arrow pointing to the chair. The debriefing officer spends the session pacing around the chair, and (if necessary) discourages PCs from sitting in it. Chair is lethal.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.