Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online

Team Leader Clearance:
Number of Service Services:
Secret Society Missions
Anti-Mutant
Computer Phreak
Death Leopard
Communist
FCCC-P
Corpore Metal
Frankenstein Destroyer
Free Enterprise
Mystic
Humanist
Pro Tech
Illuminati
Psion
PURGE
Romantic
Sierra Club

Your Mission

The Computer has generated the following mission for your team. It has been carefully designed to ensure the maximum safety and satisfaction for your team.

Paranoia is the Irrational Fear Someone is Out To Get You

(Fear) Dominant type of fear to install in the PCs: Alpha Complex is just a simulation; nothing is physically real.

(Irrational) General kind of weirdness or irregularity that prompts The Computer to assign a mission to the Troubleshooters: One kind of technological object (behavior modifier (hypnosis devices, pheromone emitters, subsonic/supersonic irritants); Problem: turns on/off inappropriately) is behaving far too well.

(Someone) Person, people, organization or agency responsible for the situation: A subsector's Infrareds, who have gone off their pharmatherapy and are now conspiring against The Computer, led by RED PLC order processing worker (bureaucratic obstacle, amicable, self-interested, ordinary). (The identity of the Someone need not be obvious at the mission's outset, and in fact things may play out more appropriately if the Someone is not discovered until late in the proceedings.)

(Out To Get You) General apparent threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A minor malfunction in RED (Tension 6) empty reactor outer core may grow into a major problem. The PCs must fix the malfunction and deal with the problems already created. The threat is a lie.

(Out To Get You) General real threat posed by the situation, or the consequences if the situation is left unresolved: A mysterious command makes all autopilot vehicles home in on ORANGE (Tension 7) Junior Citizen fort (no Commies allowed!), threatening terrible harm en route; the "Someone" wants a traffic jam there.

Mission Alert: Via high-frequency radio transmission that gives PCs excruciating headaches and sends petbots crazy with excitement. Message is intact and correct.

Briefing: Briefing is in acid-etched sinkhole under food production area. Officer skims through the entire briefing as if he expects those present to know all details already, then walks out without allowing questions.

This Mission: Transfer the highly dangerous traitor ORANGE CPU Computer monitor monitor (bureaucratic obstacle, gullible (worryingly lacking in paranoia)) to a more secure VIOLET (Tension 18) crowded grooming and hygiene station. Make sure he doesn't die; we want to save that for the Date with Death vidshow.

Outfitting: C-Bay or other online auction site: Price: list price. Delivery: please allow 24 hours for delivery to PCs' specified address. Items the PCs want are listed against a red-tinted background. No other items are. What's up? (Nothing. But keep the players nervous about it.)

Debriefing: A pitch black room, with dim light filtering in under the entrance door. Unsettling clicking noises, like a trigger being pulled on a jammed gun.

Find weird phrasing, clearly erroneous output, or other signs of filthy commie mutant traitor sabotage? Copy the offending passages and email them to the High Programmer for investigation.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online is based on the Mission Blender included with the Paranoia XP GM's Screen, published by Mongoose Publishing Ltd., and is provided here with the permission of the copyright owners. Copyright © 1983, 1987, 2004 by Eric Goldberg & Greg Costikyan. PARANOIA is a trademark of Eric Goldberg and Greg Costikyan. All rights reserved.

Paranoia XP is fun. Other games are not fun. Buy Paranoia.

The Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online software was developed by Alan De Smet. Find bugs, weird language, or error messages? Want to chat about the Paranoia XP Mission Blender Online? Email me.